Family

Family

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Tagged!!!

Thanks T!!!

1. WHAT ARE FOUR JOBS THAT YOU HAVE HAD IN LIFE?
Bagelby's was my first job, then I worked at a law office in IF, then at Tendoy Elementary as a Kindergarten aid for 2 years, and NOW I'm a mom!!!! ;)

2. WHAT ARE FOUR PLACES WHERE YOU HAVE BEEN?
This is where I look truly pathetic! Vegas! - AZ (not for fun though)- Cali and Canada (in HS)

3. WHAT ARE FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS?
Chocolate!! Spagetti, Cake, and Mandrin Chicken from Mandrin House!

4. WHO ARE FOUR PEOPLE YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET TO KNOW BETTER?
My mom, I wish she were here so I could DRILL her with all of the questions I have for her. Katy- I know her past, but I wish we lived closer so I could just hang out with her,- all of the time! - My grandparents, I'd like to know more about their past- and my dad...I love to hear his stories.

5. FOUR REASONS I LOVE BEING ME?
My hubbs! My kids! My famliy! My experiences!

6. WHAT ARE FOUR CLASSES YOU WISH WERE OFFERED TO YOU THAT YOU COULD PARTICIPATE IN RIGHT NOW?
Violin- I want to learn it again, probably need a money managment course- that would be boring though. - Cooking- and gardening.

7. WHO ARE FOUR FRIENDS OR RELATIVES THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO TAG? Katy, Nicole, Doug and Shanny, Karianne - and anyone that I may have missed!

Monday, April 28, 2008

Picture Time...






There's been a lot going on this past week- we met a new 'perspective' member of the family (more on that after the cat's out of the bag...) plus we got together with my extended family-at Sizzler- Yum! That was awesome by the way. We NEVER get to spend time together, so that was the best part of the week-in my opinion. ;) I'm also finishing up the semester and happy to say that after Tuesday (next week) I'm officially done for Spring. YAY! Clinton's had a few fun Spring field trips (the greenhouse and fire dept.- he got to sit in the truck!) We've been cleaning up and playing outside... see?- endless fun! Ahhh... the beginnings of Spring! Well, here's a few shots of the kids and their fun.
1.Cara and her Crimpy hairdo!- She felt "gro-ge-us!"
2. Clinton playing "monster trucks" in the dirt of the garden.
3. Cara "snow white" eating her Poisonous apple. (Too perfectly -unplanned.)
4. Clinton and puppy takin a cruise in the "buggy."
We've all had a very fun week out in the sun. I can't wait to start the summer. I LOVE May!!! Probably my favorite month of the year-weather wise. Here comes the rain and the beautiful flowers! I'm so excited!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Always behind...

SO- I was babysitting my darling little niece yesterday and marveling at how she and my daughter get SO lost in their own little worlds. I literally handed them some old 'onesies' and baby jammies to dress their dolls in...and they were SILENT for almost 3 hours!!! I couldn't believe it! It made me think about how caught up in life I can get. All day long I was stressing about everything I could possibly conjure up in my mind. The always - imperfect- state of my house, the term paper and summaries I have due next week,- and the upcoming comprehensive final, - how I really NEED to spend more time working with Clinton on homework and reading, the growing weeds in my yard (already!) - bills, what's for dinner, I need to go to the store, call my grandma, find Cara's shoes, feed the fish- AHHH! Why does life always seem so complicated? Then I realized, it's the way I'M perceiving life that makes it complicated. Sure, all of those things need to be done- and will always need to be done. But- I overload myself into becoming so overwhelmed, I feel like shutting down and then I don't accomplish much except for worrying. I was talking to Clint about this last night and he told me to not "worry about it so much"- simple enough. How do guys always think so 'one-dimensional'? Initially, I thought- "Yeah right..I'll just NOT worry". But really...- I think he's right. I NEED to NOT worry and I NEED to put that and ONLY THAT at the top of my list. Maybe then, everything else will just fall into place and I won't have to suffer a heart attack at the tender age of 27. Brilliant, isn't he? I tell you- it's those little epiphanies that give me the strength to make it through the bad days. - Thanks Hon. ;)

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

New Find!


SO- I was doing my usual 'twice a week' browsing on Itunes when I came across a song by my faves (Foo Fighters)- (Everlong) but redone by a string quartet. Vitamin String Quartet. Sweet. - I love anything to do with orchestra/symphony/strings- but to have one of my all time favorite songs...wooo...it was just meant for me. SO I follow the little linky arrow and low and behold- a WHOLE STINKIN CD OF REMAKES!!! AHHHH! I could barely contain myself. Clint began to tease me until I found Pearl Jam remake too- ahhh...yes... now he could understand. (PJ is his fave) - Well, needless to say, he was much more willing to let me download mine after he got his. Truly, I was kind of surprised he liked it- but he's actually jammin right now. It's mellow-but fun to listen to the new sound of an old song. Well, this "Vitamin String Quartet" has 8 pages of 'redone' songs and CDs. I would recommend everyone checking it out. Especially if you're a 'strings' fan like me. Happy day. ;)

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Inspiring Story...


I know this is a long read, but it is definitely worth the time. We first heard this story on the radio in SLC, coming home from Primary's. It was November. Clint's family has a tradition to read stories to one another on Christmas eve to bring in the Spirit. We KNEW this had to be our story. I called the station and they were nice enough to email me the outline. We handed out pictures to his family afterward of another sweet little baseball player we know -(wink-wink-) and the story had us all in tears. It's an inspirational look at how selflessness can affect others more than we realize.



Would you have made the same choice? At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?' The audience was stilled by the query. The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.' Then he told the following story: Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?' Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps. Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.' Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt . His Father watched with a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat. At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball. However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher. The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game. Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first! Run to first!' Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled. Everyone yelled , 'Run to second, run to second!' Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball ... the smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home. All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay' Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third ! Shay, run to third!' As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!' Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team. 'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'. Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Only time will tell...

We were really hoping this whole "blood in the urine" thing was over and done with, but apparently it isn't that easy. Through the week I've continued to see spots, he's told me at random times that his "pee-pee was red at school." But I thought it was just trying to heal and we would see it eventually teeter out. No such luck. Yesterday was as bad as the first morning. We went back into the docs and they decided it was more than just a bruise- they think he has a torn ureter. How that gets better...I don't know. And wouldn't it be prone to infection if it's 'down there'? All good questions for the docs I'm sure. Anyway, we have to "wait and see" if anything happens over the weekend. If it doesn't get better they want to catheterize him. (NOT fun.) Just to make sure it's NOT coming from the bladder or kidney. But I'm afraid that would only injure him more. This morning it was worse than EVER. I'm not sure that the docs understand how bad it is. Of course every time we go to give a sample it looks clean. Then we come home and the clots and blood appear again. I don't know-we're kind of at a stand still. We keep waiting for it to get better, but it's not...so then do we cath him (and take the chance of tearing it more?) - Or do we continue to wait?
The joys of parenthood.
But- on the bright side, Clinton continues to BE Clinton. He doesn't seem to have any pain. Our biggest hurdle is getting him INTO the doctor. The kid has developed a serious case of "doctor anxiety" since his surgery last fall. I'm just hoping that fear won't be magnified by a blood draw and a catheter. Only time will tell...that seems to be one of Clinton's biggest themes. ;)
Well, last might I got to go scrapbooking with my sis-in-law Shannon. SO fun! I haven't been in such a long time... it was awesome to get SO much done!! The only bad part is I get in there and gain about 100 new ideas- that doesn't help with "getting caught up" at all. But it was great none-the-less. I'm hoping I can finish my project this weekend- that's a pretty ambitious goal, but again- Only time will tell. ;)

SOTD- I have a couple of new ones that I've been trying out. Derrick told me about a Stone Sour song called ZZyzxx road (sp?) It's a lot calmer than I thought it would be coming from those guys. It has some pretty good guitaring goin on too. But- in all reality I'm still in my Linkin Park/Blue October phase. - Clean versions of course. B.O. has one that I'm diggin on- It's called "A Quiet Mind"- liking that. And just about anything from LP is great, as long as the screaming is kept to a minimum. - Not a huge fan of screaming- but I do LOVE their overall sound. I just downloaded "Faint" and "With you"-(the Reanimation Remix) so those 2 are on the top 10 most played on the Ipod. ;)

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Health Scare


Today made up for all of Sunday's calm. Early this morning while I was getting ready for school, Clinton came in to use the bathroom. I noticed he had a large amount of blood in his urine. Well, I won't go into details- but needless to say it alarmed me. Everything came to a screeching halt. I've had bladder infections before and that alone made me sick to my stomach to imagine him in that much pain. They're terrible. And I know that sometimes blood happens along with them. But this- this was NOT bladder infection bleeding. This was much much more than that. And it wasn't only that fact that bothered me, it was the fact that Clinton has only one Kidney that bothered me. I knew if it was more than a bladder infection- which is what I was thinking, that he could be in big trouble. That single kidney gives me such anxiety. It's such a precious commodity. We got to the doctor at about 11:00- and by this time he had passed a large clot and his urine looked like cranberry juice- I was internally freaking out. It didn't help that the doctor echoed my every fear. He too thought it was his kidney- and was very worried about it.
Well, I won't go on- and I'm trying my best to keep details to a minimum. But, the point to my rambling is to illustrate how quickly priorities can change. In an instant I was no longer worried about Clinton missing the bus, Cara getting warm clothes on, me getting to class on time- I was worried about Clinton's health, his life. (By the way- he's OK- it was something completely different- that after a couple of different opinions, ended up being exactly the problem)- but it brought me right back to those "bad days" in the hospital. When all I cared about was making it through the day with him. Now I take everyday for granted. I'm so blessed to have my kids. So blessed. I can't imagine being without them now. I HATE seeing them in pain. I was so glad to have Clint here-close to us. It really put things into perspective for me, Clint too. He and I used to be so much more involved in what life was really about. Family- trying our best to do what's best. We've since then drifted away into the more- less important- parts of life. Today gave us a reminder. Not only us but our dear family was so consumed with worry. I was on the phone ALL DAY. He's such a loved little boy. Everyone has a soft spot for Clinton. I'm so glad he's feeling better and he's reminded us about how precious health is- again! ;)

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Randomness..

Today has been surprisingly,-completely relaxing. (I know Sunday's are supposed to be the "day of rest" and all-but it rarely seems that way for me.) There's always the upcoming school/work week to worry about, and finishing homework-doing laundry-ect... it usually makes me cringe. Even this morning as we were all getting ready for church, it was strangely peaceful. No screaming kids, no endless nagging to go to Primary, no spilling all over church clothes 5 minutes before walking out the door...none of it. And through Sacrament, I kept waiting for it to come, the smashing of someones head into a pew, or not sharing of snacks that makes one or both of them scream...again nothing. Matter-of-fact after the talks were over and we had closing prayer, I realized I'd been in such deep thought about how wonderful and loving the day was- I hadn't HEARD the talks! I reassured myself by realizing that I had probably learned a much more valuable lesson- taking time to appreciate the present... and also soaking in the peacefulness the day provided. It's just so nice to feel truly rejuvenated when beginning the new week.

Things are still up in the air about Clint's work. We are determined to try everything we can here before sending him long haul. He had a promising encounter with a local company on Friday and we are PRAYING they call on Monday to offer a job. It would likely be long hours at work, but at least he'd be able to come home at night and share dinner and/or bedtime with us. Hopefully it will work out. ;)

Cara gave me a bit to ponder on this morning. I was reading out in the living room at about 8:00 this morning when I heard quiet sobs coming from the hallway. I knew it was her and tried to quiet her before she could wake Clinton. She threw her arms around me and whispered something in my ear. I couldn't hear her at all and had to ask her about 3 times to repeat herself. I asked her if she had a bad dream (as this usually is the case) but she told me 'no'- she said
"I miss my grandma Joan."
-For those of you that don't know grandma Joan, she is my mother - she also died 8 years ago.
I didn't think I heard her correctly. We have talked about Grandma Joan, but lately haven't said much. She again told me that she missed her and that she wanted to go to "her house." I then tried to comfort her -she was still quietly crying- by telling her that we were already, in fact, IN her house. That the house we are living in was grandma Joan's house before she went to Heaven. That calmed her as she thought about it, and she dropped the subject after stating,"I just love my grandma Joan."
I wasn't sure what to make of that, still am not sure really. I've always believed that children could pass back and forth between the veil. Especially at night or while sleeping. It's something I gained a testimony of when Clinton was in the hospital and sedated 20 hours of the day. I knew at times he was not "with me" in spirit. And at those times I was incredibly relieved. I have never , though, had any such "feeling" with Cara. Until this morning.
It could just be wishful thinking, of course. I've always grieved the fact that my mother would never get to be "a grandma" in the Earthly sense. I'd never get to watch her interact with my children. But, the feeling that possessed me at the genuine nature of Cara's words made me immediately realize that even though I may not see it, my mom does "know" my children. Probably better that I do. The Spirit was strong within me- and the thought of Cara visiting with her, or even just "knowing" of her- who she's named after -(Cara Joan)... brought me solace. It was an interesting few moments, at very least.

SOTD- I've been in a mellow mood the past few days, maybe it's the beautiful weather putting me at ease. I don't know, but I love the song "Pieces" by Red. They are a fairly new band Derrick introduced me to, that I have grown to love. They're Rock- mostly. But there are a few songs on the record that are soft and... soothing almost. They are a mix of Linkin Park (the rock-techno aspect)/ One Republic ( for the Piano and strings intertwined within a good beat)/and Dashboard Confessional (vocals). I really like the CD much to my surprise. I don't know why I am so surprised- Derrick has never steered me wrong. He hit the nail on the head this time though. I LOVE LOVE LOVE rock music blended with Symphony. I used to play the violin and much appreciate the difficulty behind it. So this for me is the perfect blend of flavors-if you will. ;)

Thursday, April 10, 2008

RE: Books, Books, Books...

OK- so I may have fibbed a little bit about the netlibrary site being totally free. I got online to browse through some of the titles of the PDF books and they want you to register to gain access to the site. It's 8.95 a year. BUT- for those of you like me, that are just interested in the audio book sector anyway (I couldn't just sit at my computer and read)- those links are free. I am currently downloading Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte. -Very excited about that by the way. - So- sorry for the mix up, but I hope to find some more classics that I've always wanted to dive into. Happy Searching!!

SOTD- It's a Blue October day for me today, the 2 songs that have been spinning are "Quiet Mind" and "Calling You.' "Quiet Mind" is mellow, lax sounding. And "Calling You" is just cute. The words are sweet and they remind me of my hubby when he's away from home. - There, now you really know why I like it so much...I'm a mush, ok?

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Books, Books, Books...


OK- since I've read the Twilight books, I've been officially re-addicted to reading. It's been so long since I've dedicated the time to read- it's like a part of me has been awakened. It's lovely. So anyway, I've found a couple of sites for you book lovers that I'd like to share. The first is a site I learned about at the library actually- the address is http://www.netlibrary.net/ there are free downloads of audio books, pdf files of books to download, ect... The site is mostly made up of classics and educational literature- it's fun to browse through -Oh, and the good news for you fellow IPOD owners is that the audio books are downloadable to Itunes. Yay! And for those of you that enjoy audio books like I do, there's Audible.com It's a site that has downloadable audio books (also downloadable to Itunes) for a monthly fee- you pick a payment plan according to how many credits you want. I love it- definitely check out the netlibrary site though- it's all free and I'm sure there's something for everyone. Let me know what you think! ;)

Spring Cleaning...

Well, it has begun. That time of year when I can't stand having anything extra inside the house. Although, I could be a little premature compared to other years- it's still to yucky outside to put toys,plants, ect.. outside. But- I can't take it anymore! It seems like I spend hours sorting through things and compiling them into different categories (Garbage, DI, hand me downs, storage,ect.) and I turn around to have to do it again. AHHH! I got to thinking about this the other day after a trip to our favorite dollar store, I went in for 2 things and came out with 3 bags!! WHY do I do this to myself?!?!? It's JUNK!! Cara was there with me and of course- that doesn't help things, every time she'd find a coloring book or a little doll, I'd say-ok- but that's it! She came home with 5 things! I know that doesn't sound like much-5 bucks- 5 toys- but in a house where we should be saving money and getting RID of toys, it's RIDICULOUS! The worst part of it all is- there's no one to blame but myself! SO- I'm making an April's resolution- no more spending and no more buying of crap. That's it. I'm actually kind of excited...I think once I get the hang of it- it will be MORE gratifying to do WITHOUT. Wish me luck! Here's to cutting back!!!
SOTD- I've had a lot of people ask me about "The Sound of Pulling Heaven Down"- which has quickly become one of my favorites. It's by Blue October. The words are dramatic and haunting- and I just LOVE Justin Furstenfeld's (the lead singer) voice. Happy listening! ;)

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Misc Ramblings...













This weekend Cara and I decided we needed some 'girl' time and that we were going to indulge our whims with HAIRCUTS! There's something about a new 'do' that is so refreshing! I haven't really cut my hair for a long time- actually I think it's been a year or two...wow. SO- needless to say this feels great. I LOVE Cara's cut. She's so gorgeous- I could butch her hair on all sides and she'd still be the perfect picture of beauty. She loves it too- definitely one of those girls that will thrive on changing her hair. Such a girly girl.


It's so great to have a daughter to experience all of those wonderful "girly' things with. I never thought I'd have daughters, I thought I'd be one of those women destined to have 5 boys,- trucks and baseball bats all over the house. And I didn't mind that, I actually worried more about having a girl than all of the boys, drama and all... - But it's so GREAT! Totally different than I ever imagined. My mom used to always tell me, "It's different with your daughter, you understand things better." And it rings SO true. Not only that but she is the perfect fit for a sister for Clinton (very patient and loving)- and also the perfect stubborn match for her father. ;)(Their spats are Hilll-arious to witness!) I feel like I often speak of Clinton and his miraculous life and nature- but I'm awed by Cara and the lively spirit she brings into our home. She is essential for our family. I'm so so so grateful I got a daughter- not just any daughter, but HER. She's such a Peach! ;)


Ok- so another thing I've been wanting to do- is an idea I've stolen from Stephenie Meyer. (Author of Twilight Series)- She made playlists of songs she would listen to or that were inspiring for that time period (or book she was writing) in her life. SO- I want to do something similar. Those who know me know what a HUGE HUGE HUGE lover of music I am- (the hubs says I should be an IPOD salesman...) so I want to start listing a song/songs that I am into at that current period in time. I have so many favorites-but I want to name the ones that stand out in my mind the most - That Day. I'll stick them in at the end of each posting and encourage you all to do the same. It will be fun to look back and remember what music was influencing me at that time. ;) Oh- and another thing I wanted to do- something I'm stealing from Kristine this time..(sorry Kris- hope you don't mind!) - Is to keep a running list of all the crazy things my kids say. I read through yours Kris- and it is Hilll-arious! I loved it! I always try to make mental note to write down things that they've said that make me laugh- and I never get it done. This way will be much easier for me. OK- that's it- I'll stop rambling...


Song of the day (SOTD)- there's a couple... my current fave is "Only One" by Yellowcard. Love it! I also love "Ocean Ave." by the same band- but I like both of them better acoustic. I have a thing for live /acoustic versions. For those of you with Itunes- check out the Sessions@AOL-EP versions of Yellow Card. On that set there's a song (that I didn't like at all until they put out an acoustic v. of it)- It's called "View From Heaven"- I like the words, and the feel of the music when its cut down and simplified, also by- Yellowcard.